How Do We Label the People in Our Life so they Fit ?

We often assign roles to the people in our lives so we can make sense of where they belong. It feels safer that way—neater. But what happens when someone doesn’t quite fit the label we’ve given them?

Sometimes, we call someone a friend, but they see deeper into us than anyone else ever has.

Sometimes, we call someone a spouse, but the connection feels more like two polite strangers navigating a shared routine.

Sometimes, even a brief encounter with a stranger can impact far greater than the titles we reserve for long-standing relationships.

We’re taught to define people quickly: family, friend, partner, colleague. These definitions can help us function, communicate, and manage expectations. But often, they leave little room for the complexity of what a person really brings into our lives.

Not everyone who loves us is meant to stay. Not everyone we’ve walked away from has truly left. Some connections simply refuse to be filed under a single word. They defy boundaries. They evolve.

And maybe the problem isn’t in the people—it’s in our need for clarity where life was meant to stay a little mysterious.

So we learn to live in the in-between.

We stop demanding that every bond makes sense to someone else.

We accept that some people exist in our lives more like seasons than definitions—shaping us quietly, leaving their mark without needing to be explained.

Maybe the real question isn’t how to label them.

Maybe it’s: Can we allow someone to mean something… even when we don’t have the language for what that is?